


darkness 4 my life

by ohvictor



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Gen, Team Bonding, rehearsal fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-28 12:31:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19812364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohvictor/pseuds/ohvictor
Summary: Rei looks at the three of them — Koga, furious; Kaoru, unrepentant; Adonis, trying to become invisible. He takes a deep breath.“Let’s run it again.”(darkness 4 piece for cantare, the enstars songs zine)





	darkness 4 my life

**Author's Note:**

> hi! this is my piece for cantare, the enstars songs zine. you can view the [full zine here](https://twitter.com/enstsongszine/status/1148398960119205888%22)! i was tasked with writing a piece for undead's song darkness 4. 
> 
> as you can see from the word count, it got a bit out of hand LOL. i have a lot of feelings about undead as a unit, and i poured a lot of them into this piece. i'll elaborate more in the end notes so as not to spoil anything(?). i hope you enjoy!
> 
> rating is for koga, who swears a lot. the title... will hopefully be changed once i think of something better, LOL. for now, it's this.

“I’ve been calling it ‘Darkness 4’.” Rei opens his laptop, running his fingertip over the trackpad to wake it up faster. Koga, Kaoru, and Adonis, sitting in chairs facing Rei in the light music club room, stare back at him impassively. “I think you’ll understand better by hearing it, so if you’ll give me a moment...”

The laptop meanders towards wakefulness, and finally responds to Rei’s touch a moment later, allowing him to view his desktop. Rei pulls up the demo track he’s created in his composition program, and hits _play_. 

The song starts with some simple piano chords; he’d taken a week to get them right, even though it’s only ten seconds’ worth of audio. Then the guitar kicks in like a wave of dark energy, and Koga sits up in his chair, his interest piqued. The interest slowly drains from his eyes when the guitar fades out in favor of vocals, piano, and drums, where Rei’s gone a little heavy on cymbals and is man enough to admit it. Rei always sings the four parts in the demo tracks himself, but he’s got an idea of who will have each line. When the guitars kick back in for the pre-chorus, Koga’s eyebrows raise, and it occurs to Rei that he should watch the others’ faces too, but Adonis’ expression is impassive, and Kaoru looks bored. 

As the chorus starts, Adonis’ brow furrows, Koga perks up further, and Kaoru takes his phone out of his pocket and starts texting. Maybe Rei should give him the benefit of the doubt—maybe he’s jotting down notes about the song. However, he keeps typing in his phone as the chorus finishes and the next verse starts, and doesn’t look up again. Not for the bridge where four Reis sing the title lyric, _Darkness 4 my life_ , nor the final chorus where the instrumentation drops out at the beginning, nor Rei’s clumsy attempt at overlaying different tracks of his guitar together, nor the rhythmic drum and guitar at the end.

Rei shuts the lid of his laptop and surveys his unit members. Koga’s eyes are shining; Adonis’ brow is still furrowed. In the silence after the song’s end, Kaoru locks his phone and slips it back into his pocket, and has the gall to look back up at Rei with a _What?_ expression.

“Do you have sheet music?” Koga bursts out. “And I get to play guitar, right?”

“Yes, yes,” Rei says. He reaches into his bag and grabs the folder he’s kept the sheet music in since he printed it out during lunch. Incidentally, it’s a Knights-themed plastic folder, but at least Koga doesn’t comment on it beyond getting a little squinty. Rei hands out packets of sheet music to each unit member, including one for himself, even though he knows the song by heart already. “I’ll play the demo again, so follow along.” 

He opens his laptop and starts the demo again. Koga starts flipping through his sheet music packet, chewing on his lip as he concentrates. He’s fascinating to watch, with his nailbitten fingers tracing the rise and fall of the notes, his mouth soundlessly forming the words of the lyrics. In the sheet music, it’s written out who sings which line, and Rei looks between his unit members as their parts play. Adonis is following along carefully, albeit with none of the visual stims or tics that Koga displays, his mouth closed and his fingers still as he holds the packet, but Rei can see his eyes moving along the lines of music. Kaoru sets the packet in his lap and places his phone on top of it so he can keep texting.

Well, that can’t be helped. At least _most_ of the unit is engaged.

As Rei expected, as soon as the demo finishes for the second time, Koga opens his mouth and starts asking questions. “This is in 3, right? And it’s so slow too, ya know, none of our other songs’re like that—are you trying to flex on someone?” (Shu, but Koga never has to know that.) “I know ya just used computer-generated drums, but I bet it’s gonna sound so fucking sick with _real_ drums, and with my guitar, of course. And the piano part is killer—”

Adonis’ eyes are glazing over, so Rei cuts across Koga. “Yes, all of that is true, doggie.” Koga opens his mouth to bite back, but Rei talks over him. “This song is special, a little different from the rest of our repertoire, and I think you can all see why. It’s slower, the time signature is different, and the harmonies are denser than what we’ve done in the past, even with Honey Milk... I believe we’ll have to work closer than ever to get it perfectly right, and it’s best if we can practice it together rather than separately. To that end, I’d like to schedule some extra practice time—”

“Hakaze,” Koga interrupts, and Rei emerges from his visions of how good Darkness 4 could sound to see Kaoru is still on his phone. “Senpai. Whatever. Can you fucking pay attention for once?”

Kaoru shrugs one shoulder, not looking up as his fingers continue to fly across his phone screen. “I’m listening, I’m listening.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Okay,” Kaoru agrees blithely. “I’ll just take the demo home and learn it on my own.”

“The vampire bastard _just_ said you can’t do that with this song,” Koga snaps. 

“Well, tough luck, puppy,” Kaoru sing-songs, “I have a date to get to, so you’ll just have to deal with it, hm? Without me here distracting him, you can impress Sakuma-san much more easily!”

He slides off his stool and picks his bag up from the floor. Koga is puffing up like a pastry in the oven, complete with steam, and Adonis looks like he’s dissociating. Rei takes a deep breath and shuts his laptop again.

“Let’s end practice here,” he says. Koga starts to argue, but Rei holds up his hand. “We’ll reconvene on Wednesday, same time. Kaoru-kun,” he presses, and Kaoru shrugs. Good enough. “Wednesday it is. I will send you the demo online, so please look over the music.”

“ _I_ will,” Koga growls. Adonis nods in agreement, his hands curling nervously around the packet of sheet music. The door swings shut behind Kaoru, and Rei tries not to despair.

-

On Wednesday, Rei waits ten minutes past the scheduled time for Kaoru to appear. Koga is growing increasingly prickly, pacing around the room with his guitar strapped to his chest, and Adonis sits quietly in his chair, not reacting as Koga kicks various things in the light music club room. Rei allows this behavior, since statistically Koga cares more about the club than Rei does, so if Koga chooses to kick club equipment or shelves and risk breaking things, that’s his issue. Kaoru never shows, so Rei reluctantly gets out his computer after ten minutes.

“So much for nailing it after listening to the demo,” Koga hisses, slamming himself down in a chair. “God, fuck that guy.”

“Well, he does usually get it right in the end,” Rei hums. “Even if we only hear it at the live performance.” Defending Kaoru—to Koga, who seems set on not changing his opinion—is a losing battle that Rei’s long grown tired of. He opens his computer and pulls up the demo file, this time with the vocal tracks silenced. “Let’s try singing through it once with the instrumental track.”

As they sing through the first verse and chorus, Rei handling Kaoru’s parts as well as his own, it’s clear that both Koga and Adonis practiced at home, and not just from the fact that they’ve both highlighted their parts in the sheet music. They’re both checking the papers for their lyrics as they sing, perhaps due to anxiety or perfectionism, but they aren’t sightreading — they have their notes mostly correct. What’s more, it’s clear they both enjoy singing it. Koga’s eyes are shining the way they did when he first heard the song, and he’s rocking in his seat as he follows along. Adonis’ tells are less obvious, but the way the corners of his mouth quirk up when he sings a line perfectly tells Rei he’s put effort into learning the music, and that he’s satisfied with his work. 

Just liking the music and preparing isn’t enough, though. Rei notices a few lines in that Koga is approaching the song with his usual loud gusto, snapping through the consonants with a growl in his throat. Rei’s _sure_ he said this song was different, even though it has UNDEAD’s typical loud guitar and drums, but Koga isn’t treating it differently. It’s as if he’s singing Darkness 4 with the same energy as Destruction Road, Rei realizes. When the demo track finishes, Rei pauses it before it loops back, and voices this to Koga, as gently as he can. He’s already down _one_ unit member, after all.

Koga bristles. “What the hell do you mean? I sounded fucking awesome in Destruction Road!”

“Yes, that’s true. But these are different songs,” Rei says calmly. “You need to sing slower and gentler. Rather than the sharp edge of your voice, you need to approach it with the melodic middle.” Does that make sense to anyone but him? Koga looks confused, but Adonis is nodding along.

“I think... This is a song where we can really show off our voices,” Adonis says. He’s looking down at his sheet music, so his voice comes off muffled. “You should spend time on each note, and let the richness of your voice come through.”

“I don’t need your help,” Koga scoffs. He adjusts his position in his chair and flips back to the first page of sheet music. “Let’s run it again.”

Despite brushing Adonis off, it’s clear this time that Koga is taking his advice. This results in him hanging onto his notes too long, though, and bleeding into the others’ parts, or clashing with chord changes. Rei watches Koga cut himself off with a snarl, frustrated with his own performance. Adonis’ face creases with worry, and during the second verse he overcompensates for Koga’s mistakes by cutting his own line off early, probably thinking it’ll give Koga more time to sound out his line, but Koga just turns on him with a scowl. 

“Don’t drop off early!”

Adonis hesitates, and then nods. “Sorry, Oogami.”

Because Koga told Adonis off instead of singing, Rei rewinds the track back to Koga’s line. Koga sings it passably, although it bleeds into the next line, which is Kaoru’s. Rei sings it instead, politely ignoring the way Koga mouths _Fuck you_ at Kaoru’s name in the sheet music.

They run it a few more times, as Koga grows increasingly frustrated, his sheet music bearing the brunt of it as his fingers clench around the edges like claws. Finally, Rei stops the music. “I think that’s enough for today, since we’re missing Kaoru-kun... Please continue to practice on your own.”

“Thanks for the practice,” Adonis says amicably, grabbing his bag from by his chair. He exits the light music club room with the air of leaving Rei to deal with Koga, and Rei can feel a headache growing behind his eyes as Koga starts barking about something, probably the song. Rei would love to go to sleep now, already overexerted from singing two parts and running practice, but he holds himself in his chair and lets Koga rant about the song, nodding respectfully whenever Koga draws breath. 

“The guitar part isn’t in this sheet music, so you need to give me some more sheet music.”

“Yes, doggie.”

“Fuck off.”

“I’d like you to get your vocals perfect first.”

“They’re already fine! Better than Adonis or Hakaze’s!”

Rei overlooks the dropped honorific; Koga’s already angry enough. “Adonis-kun’s vocals are fine. I know yours can be better. Why don’t you put in some extra practice and really show me that talent of yours?”

Sometimes Koga plays like a fiddle. His chest puffs up proudly at the challenge. “Hell yeah! You already know I’m going to crush this song!”

“Not that sort of song,” Rei reminds him. He yawns, stretching his arms behind his head. “If you’re going to practice, do you mind going somewhere else? I’m very tired...”

“You’re such a damn loser,” Koga scoffs, but he obeys, dumping his papers back into his bag. Rei shuffles to his coffin and falls asleep as soon as the lid shuts above him.

-

After a lot of struggling to align schedules (and one veiled threat Rei prefers to forget about), all four members of UNDEAD assemble at their practice on Friday. Adonis is freshly showered after a run around the track; Kaoru fidgets in his seat, anxious for the week to end already; Koga looks like he might chew through his guitar strap if rehearsal doesn’t start soon. As amusing as that might be to watch, Rei slides off his stool and claps his hands together, getting everyone’s attention.

“Thank you all for coming today. I want to spend an hour or two working on singing Darkness4. We’ll begin working on choreography next week—”

“Do you already have steps planned?” Koga interrupts, literally on the edge of his seat with excitement. “If you don’t, I’ve got some ideas—”

“Can you please not interrupt Sakuma-san,” Kaoru sighs, “I want this to be over as quickly as possible.”

“You are also interrupting,” Adonis murmurs. Both Koga and Kaoru turn on him, and he holds up his hands defensively. “I meant, in the interest of time—”

“Yes, I’m glad you’re all so schedule-conscious,” Rei deadpans. He opens his laptop and loads the instrumental backing for Darkness4. “Kaoru-kun, I’m particularly excited that you’re here, as I had to sing your parts as well as my own during our last rehearsal. I hope you’ve been working on the song like you told me you would.”

“I listened to it,” Kaoru says, and Rei intuits that this, at least, is the truth. “It’s kinda slow, isn’t it?”

“You’re such a fucking moron,” Koga bursts out, apparently unable to control himself. “You wouldn’t know good music if it—”

“That’s enough,” Rei says, raising his voice to be heard over Koga’s snarl. Kaoru is withdrawing, his arms crossing protectively over his chest even as he faces Koga with a careless grin. “Let’s sing, and let that convey our feelings.”

“Just like idols,” Adonis says. Koga and Kaoru ease back into their seats, their attention turned to Rei’s laptop. Rei hits play, and watches Koga make an air guitar with his fingers and play along with the song’s intro.

Singing with all four members of UNDEAD present is usually a good feeling, or at least a solid neutral-positive. Today, Rei feels the sensation others would call stage fright. He opens his mouth to sing the first line, feels the weight of three members’ and the entire world’s expectations on him, and the first syllable of his line gets stuck in his throat. He sees Koga’s eyes widen, and the simple urge to not look uncool in front of his kouhai breaks through the knot in his throat and frees his voice. He completes his line without further issue, and turns his gaze to Kaoru, whose line is next. 

Kaoru meets Rei’s gaze, his expression blank, and sings his line perfectly. 

Relief swells in Rei’s chest. He gives Kaoru a small, fangy smile, which Kaoru ignores. Koga’s line is next, and from the set of his jaw Rei can tell he’s resentful that Kaoru followed through on practicing on his own. Koga may be a brat, but he works hard, and his line comes out much smoother than it had at the last practice. He’s also accessing his fledgling vibrato, which may become a powerful weapon in time. Even so, though, he flubs a word in his excitement, and hangs onto the last syllable of the line too long. He cuts off with a scowl as Adonis starts his line, which in turn seems to agitate Adonis, making him come in late for his line. They’re like dominos, their individual prides knocking into each other and falling over. 

It’s a solid start, so Rei doesn’t stop them. That is, until they reach the chorus. UNDEAD has worked with harmonies before, but then Rei had layered more instruments over their voices to disguise any missed notes. In this song, there are still guitars and other instruments in the background of the chorus, but the harmony can be heard clearly through it, and especially now, singing live with the background track played from Rei’s laptop speakers, they all hear it instantly when Kaoru loses his note next to Adonis’ sure baritone, and as soon as they all start paying attention to Kaoru’s mistake, Koga loses his note as well. 

Koga getting frustrated early is troublesome, even if it’s mostly unavoidable; his temper explodes the easiest of the group, and he tends to drag everyone else with him by snapping at their heels in his anger. Rei keeps an eye on him as they move into the second verse, hoping that the second chorus will be better. Koga seems to calm down as they move through the individual lines, and, perhaps more importantly, Adonis gets all of his lines right this verse, making it only Koga who’s messing up. Again... Worrying. 

The second chorus is just like the first. This time, it’s Adonis who tries to sing more quietly, overcompensating for the others’ mistakes again, but this seems to frustrate Koga even more. In the middle of the chorus, Koga cuts off his line and snaps, “Stop singing quietly! No one can hear you!” at Adonis, who stops singing to apologize, and then Kaoru stops singing, looking irritated at the waste of practice time. Rei’s deep sigh is masked by the music still playing, but he pauses it once it’s clear they’ve lost their places.

“Let’s try it again from the beginning,” Rei says loudly, before Koga can get a word in.

They run the song again, and the holes exposed in the first, aborted runthrough only tear larger the second time around. Kaoru has his lines down, but he gets quiet during the chorus, perhaps shrinking back from the onslaught of Adonis and Koga fighting to be heard. Koga’s mounting irritation bleeds into his voice, shortening his vowels and interfering with his concentration. After the second line he messes up the timing for, he crumples one of the pages of his sheet music in frustration, and Rei only sees Kaoru flinch minutely because he’s looking for it. Adonis is desperately trying not to offend anyone, and consequently is sacrificing both tone and volume. Rei is so busy watching everyone, trying to keep track of everyone’s strengths and weaknesses, that towards the end of the song he misses a cue altogether, and earns scandalized looks from all three of his unitmates when they all come in on time and he doesn’t.

“Sorry, sorry,” he says hastily, waving his hand. The song is nearly over, so he stops the instrumental track there. “You’re all doing well. Kaoru-kun, I can tell you practiced at home, so thank you.” He nods at Koga and Adonis as Koga opens his mouth. “You two as well, of course. I heard you at the last practice.”

Koga is leaning forward in his seat, his face like a stormcloud, so Rei sets the song instrumental back to the beginning. “Why don’t we sing through it again, and I’ll put this a little quieter, so we can really hear each other.”

“I don’t think that’ll help,” Kaoru mutters.

“Well, tough shit, because that’s the fucking point of the song,” Koga bursts out. “That guy said at the start that we had to learn to work our voices together!”

Kaoru snorts, crossing his arms across his chest. “Wow, yeah, and you’re doing a great job of that yourself.”

Koga stumbles. “Uh,” he says. “Yeah, I fucking am, because at least I come to practice regularly! We were supposed to work on this as a group, but you didn’t bother to show up last time!”

“Sakuma-san,” Kaoru says, blatantly turning away from Koga, “you’re killing me here. None of us asked you to write a song where we have to be buddy-buddy or whatever.”

“You did not, and yet I did anyway.” Rei is growing tired. “I do not require you to be buddy-buddy, but it would be nice if you worked together a little more rather than behaving like oil and water.”

“I’d like to be the water,” Kaoru shoots back. “That’s my club, after all.”

“It was a fucking metaphor!” Koga snaps.

Rei looks at the three of them — Koga, furious; Kaoru, unrepentant; Adonis, trying to become invisible. He takes a deep breath. 

“Let’s run it again.”

So they try again. And again, and again, until Rei’s resolve not to regret writing a song like this is fraying thin. The strains exposed in the first few runthroughs are only growing more apparent, so after the fifth run Rei stops them and announces they’ll go over parts individually. 

“Doggie, you’re struggling with your entrance in the chorus. Sing me your interval there.”

Koga doesn’t look up from his music. “I’m not struggling with it, and you could at least call me something more polite when I’m working my ass off here.” 

Rei ignores this, and, opening a new file in his composition program, plays the interval in question on the on-screen piano. “Sing this for me. Please.”

Koga sets his jaw angrily, but he sings it. 

“Please practice that a few times for me.” 

Koga does. Rei wonders if saying _please_ did the trick, or if Koga is just trying to prove he’s the best there. 

“Thank you,” Rei sighs. He turns to Kaoru, who meets his eyes warily. “Now you, Kaoru-kun.” He plays Kaoru’s interval, and Kaoru sings it, quieter than Koga. “Please practice that as well.”

“What about mine?” Adonis asks, as Rei starts to close the new window. 

Truthfully, Rei hasn’t heard any issues in Adonis’ transitions to the chorus. But if he singles the other two out and not Adonis, it will look like an attack on their egos, which may interfere with teamwork. He sees now that Adonis is offering him an easy out. “Yes, Adonis-kun.” He plays Adonis’ interval, nodding to himself. “Sing that for me.”

Adonis sings it, and then again, brow furrowed in concentration. Does he really need to work on it, or is he putting on a show for the sake of the others’ prides? Rei will never know. 

“Thank you, Sakuma-senpai,” Adonis says, flipping a page in his sheet music.

The others look calmer now, and in the silence, Koga hums his transition interval again. Rei lets himself breathe deeply. “All right. Are there any other parts you’re unsure of?”

“On the pre-chorus,” Kaoru says, “there’s a pause between Wan-chan’s line and mine.”

“You fucker,” Koga starts, and Rei winces. Evidently Kaoru cares less about lowering the tension than Adonis does. 

“It’s written that way,” Rei says.

“So you want that gap there?” 

“Yes. Do you have a problem with it?”

“No,” Kaoru says. 

“Then why did you bring it up,” Koga growls.

“Sakuma-san said we should bring things up if we’re unsure. I’m trying to be a good unit member,” Kaoru says. 

“Thank you, Kaoru-kun, for your diligence,” Rei cuts in, as Koga opens his mouth again. It’s like herding cats, this unit. 

Unfortunately Rei’s tactic did not work to cut down the tension. “Maybe if you really cared about being a good unit member you should’ve come to rehearsal before today, huh?”

“I practiced on my own, like I said I would.”

Koga opens his mouth again, and something in Rei snaps.

“All of you, take five.”

“We’ve only been actually rehearsing for like, twenty minutes,” Koga starts.

“You _will_ take five,” Rei repeats, laying on some of that scary vampire edge that he knows will make Koga listen. Koga’s mouth snaps shut. “And then we’re going to try something else.”

They all nod, and the tension in the room slowly starts to dissipate. Kaoru pulls his phone out of his pocket and hunches his shoulders as he taps at it in his lap; Adonis gets up from his chair and leaves the room, maybe to grab a snack. Koga goes over to where his guitar case lays in the corner of the room and takes the guitar out, and starts tuning it in sharp, agitated motions. He twists the tuning knobs with more vigor than usual, which does not serve him well as he has to turn them back in slower, more deliberate movements when the strings admonish him by sounding back the wrong notes. 

Rei watches him for a moment, and then shuffles over to his coffin and plops down in it. There should be some tomato juice left in his little fridge — ah, yes, there is. Perhaps a cool drink will clear his head.

In the end, though, he stares dully at the wall and drinks juice for the entire five minute break. Whether or not doing this helped clear his head or just dulled his frustration to the point of uncaring, he still gathers himself together and prepares to step back into his unit leader metaphorical shoes. When Adonis comes back in (holding a plastic-wrapped bun in one hand, just as Rei thought), Kaoru tucks his phone back into his pocket, and Koga puts his guitar back in the case and heads back to his seat.

“Don’t sit down just yet,” Rei says. He bullies his body into getting back up and stepping out of the coffin. “I want to go to this one classroom. It’s not too long of a walk.”

“What kind of weird bonding strategy is this, Sakuma-san,” Kaoru says.

“You’ll see,” Rei hums. “Please bring your music with you as well.”

Misgivings or no, they all follow him out of the light music club room and down the hall. The classroom Rei has in mind is, as promised, not far, and it’s only a few minutes’ walk to get there. Rei knocks lightly on the door and then enters when there’s no answer; he flicks on the lights, revealing the usual desks and chairs and classroom accoutrements, and in one corner, a grand piano, the lack of dust on the keys a sign that it’s regularly played. 

Rei nudges the piano bench back with his foot and takes a seat on it, setting his fingers on the piano keys with a sigh. He plays a few test chords, and then looks up at his unitmates, still standing awkwardly near the door. “Kaoru-kun, shut the door for me. Let’s all come stand around the piano.”

They obey, Adonis shoving the last bite of his bun into his mouth and crumpling the plastic wrapper in one hand so he can shove it into his pocket. Koga sets his sheet music on the piano, one hand guarding the bottom so it doesn’t slip off the tilted surface of the raised piano cover. 

“You don’t need sheet music?” he asks Rei.

“I have it by memory.” Rei plays the first few chords of the song, rolling his shoulders back. “I’m going to play the song on the piano, like this. And we’ll all sing our parts as usual.” It occurs to him that this is an odd request. “I know it is different from usual. Is this okay?”

Koga nods immediately. Adonis nods as well, wiping his fingers clean on his pants and turning his sheet music packet back to the first page. Kaoru looks hesitant, but then he looks up and meets Rei’s eyes, and gives him a nod of confirmation. 

Rei spreads his fingers on the keys and plays the intro to the song. 

He’s played this opening dozens upon dozens of times at home, to the point where Ritsu complained about it getting stuck in his head. It is different now, though, with his unitmates gathered around the piano, absorbing the sound of Rei’s song. They are putting a lot of trust in him right now, trust that Rei knows how to make this work, trust that they will be able to sing this right. Rei has been called a lot of things—genius, prodigy, smartass—that would suggest that he can fix any problem. And he isn’t a unit leader and music club president for nothing; he can compose and arrange, sing and play instruments, dance and choreograph... But he cannot control humans, and he can’t always predict them, either. But, he supposes, all four of them are taking a leap of faith now.

The first line is his own, and he looks down at the keys as he sings, a bad habit from practicing most often at home, in the living room or up in his bedroom, without an audience or anyone to hear if his singing is muffled. When his line ends, he almost wants to hold his breath, praying that Kaoru will come in on time, that Kaoru trusts him. He sings the last syllable and looks up from the keys, watching Kaoru as he inhales in the beat between Rei’s line and his. 

Kaoru sings, his eyes cast down at his sheet music. Rei knows that Kaoru doesn’t need to look at the music for this line, so it must be a crutch, a way to avoid the vulnerability of singing over just the piano. His voice is soft but solid, and doesn’t crack on the highest note of the line even though he’s barely putting enough breath in. Rei is hesitantly pleased. Hopefully Kaoru will grow more secure as the song goes on. 

Next is Koga, who is nodding along with the beat and comes in right on time. It seems taking a break and changing locations reset his anger meter back to a neutral level, or maybe Koga himself consciously tried to calm down and approach the song anew. Whichever it is, Rei is grateful. It’s not a cure-all, though: Koga hits his notes a little strong, and at the end of his line his mouth twists with frustration at himself. Rei catches his eye and offers a half-smile, trying to be encouraging, and Koga’s mouth twists more, an unclear reaction. 

Of the four of them, Adonis is the only one not looking down as he sings. Instead, he looks up at some distant midpoint behind Rei’s head, as if he doesn’t want to muffle his voice but doesn’t know where else to look. His voice is clear and lovely as always, and he hits his notes perfectly. 

As they enter the pre-chorus, Rei allows himself to be cautiously optimistic. Koga comes in at the end of Adonis’ line, their breaths overlapping. There’s no building guitar now, just the quiet piano backing, but Koga sings louder still in memory of the full instrumentation, his vibrato coming through audibly over the piano. Then it’s Kaoru’s line; he’s still looking down at his music, but he raises his volume a little like Koga’s. 

With this, everyone else comes in. Rei’s attention is split so many ways—watching his unitmates, playing the piano, remembering to sing his own parts—that he stumbles over a chord, but catches himself quickly and adjusts his focus. With his eyes on the keys now, he only has his ears to gauge how his unitmates are doing, but he can hear all of them, even though they’re all singing one melody for now. As they slide into the chorus and split into parts, Rei can’t help himself and looks up from the keys, his eyes sliding across the others’ faces in turn as they sing. 

He hears Kaoru lose his note, fade out, and then get back on track a measure later. He hears Koga get louder, as if hearing himself will help him keep his part. He hears Adonis, holding the lower harmony perfectly. And he hears himself, and sings just a little louder so he isn’t left behind. 

Once they make it through the first chorus, Rei allows himself to relax. The next verse goes fine, and the chorus as well. There are small slip-ups, but Kaoru doesn’t lose his part this time, and Koga looks satisfied as they move into the next section. As they reach the section with the title lyric, _Darkness 4 my life_ , Rei looks up from the piano keys to find the other three are looking up at each other as they sing, their joint melody clear and powerful over the quiet backing of the piano, and there’s even a small smile on Koga’s face. 

Something is swelling up in Rei’s chest, a feeling like pride. His fingers are shaking slightly as he plays the chords for the last chorus, and he has to remind himself to sing audibly. Even so, Koga, Kaoru, and Adonis hold their parts through the end with only one missed note, and Rei doesn’t bother to keep track of who it was. 

With the last line, they each hold _My world_ , even Rei, who has to look down at the keys again to finish out the song. The ending sounds better with the full instrumentation, in Rei’s opinion, and not just because he composed it himself, but this piano version isn’t bad either, just a little less potent, maybe. 

He takes his fingers off the keys and lifts his gaze to his unitmates, a smile playing at his lips. He’s greeted with smiles in return, Koga grinning with his cheeks flushed, Adonis smiling wider as he sees Koga’s enthusiasm, and Kaoru, wearing a small, cautious smile, looking back at Rei.

“That was fucking awesome,” Koga breathes, unable to contain himself as usual. “I mean— I guess we just needed to hear each other. I’ve never— We sometimes rehearse with less instrumentation back in the club, but I haven’t tried doing it like that...”

“It was easier to hear when we messed up,” Adonis offers. “And easier to hear what our note should be to get back on track.”

“I like that sound,” Kaoru says quietly. “I know what you meant now, Sakuma-san. That we had to practice it all together.”

Rei could _cry_. He doesn’t, though. “Yes, sometimes I have good judgments, hm?” He tries to reign in his smile, more _vampire lord_ and less _giddy teenager_ , but it’s difficult. “That was very good. I’m very pleased with all of your work. Can we try it again? Is there anything anyone would like to go over individually first?”

“Koga-kun,” Kaoru says, and Koga looks at him so fast Rei worries his neck might crack. It’s rare for Kaoru to call him by name. Kaoru’s gaze is back down at his sheet music, adjusting it idly, as he says, “I think you sound good when you belt like that. It feels really loud in here with only the piano, but it’ll be good onstage.” 

Koga doesn’t seem sure what to say back to that. He opens his mouth, shuts it, then opens it again. “Thanks.”

Kaoru nods, still shuffling his sheet music. 

“Hakaze-senpai, your... The way you say your lines is very clear,” Adonis pipes up. 

Kaoru looks surprised, but recovers quickly and shoots him a bright smile. “Hey, thanks, Adonis-kun.”

Not to be outdone, Koga speaks up as well. “Adonis, you hold your part really well in the chorus. It sounds good.”

Adonis nods. “Thanks, Oogami.”

Rei’s chest is full to bursting. He sits back on the piano bench, giving up on keeping his smile contained. “I’m happy,” he murmurs, drawing the other three’s gazes. “I knew you could pull it off.”

“Come on, we only did it once,” Koga says, but he’s smiling too, as if Rei’s smile is infectious. 

“We can do it again, though,” Kaoru says. 

“Definitely,” Adonis agrees.

Rei takes a breath, and beams back at all of them. “Show me, then,” he says, and places his hands back on the keys. 

**Author's Note:**

> the visual i had in mind for this fic grew from a clip from the backstage reel of the first enstage production, a clip where undead is rehearsing melody in the dark. (if you're interested/dm me, i can show you lol.) they are standing in a semicircle with sheet music in their hands, and as someone plays the piano in front of them, koji (rei's actor) sings his bridge line and they break into harmony for the chorus. i grew up singing in choirs, and this clip is very special to me because i love that rehearsal atmosphere where everyone's voices and parts come together audibly for the first time. i wanted to capture that moment for undead, while honoring the ways that their personalities clash and cause friction in canon.
> 
> i really hope you enjoyed this fic! if you're able, leave a comment letting me know what you think! also, hmu on [twitter](twitter.com/futarinoshoutai%22)!


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